I already did the Types of Villains, and the Types of Readers. If you haven't realized by now, I like categorizing things, goddamit. But what about those majestic beings that call themselves writers? Don't they deserve to be categorized as well? No, I'm not gonna wait for you to answer that, I'm gonna start categorizing them all by myself. According to their supernatural ability.
Similar to an ass kicker, just way, way more cruel. If it's not obvious from the name, the Feel Kicker elicits the feels. Exactly what feels are, I'm not sure. The story doesn't have to be necessarily sad, it's just.. emotional.
Usually, I have a love-cry relationship with the Feel Kickers.
My feel kicker: Melina Merchetta.
The Boyfriend Maker,
Yes, authors make boyfriends. Literary ones, but boyfriends nonetheless!! They create the perfect guy that, once the book is closed, you try to bring him to real life. Good news is, if you succeed, wohoo! Boyfriend! Bad news is, if you succeed, you're nuts.
My Boyfriend Maker: Laini Taylor. (Akiva is sitting right next to me as I write this).
Some authors just want to watch the world burn. They're murderers. In my opinion, that is. COLD BLOODED MURDERERS. Oh, it's a main character that will never die, you say? WRONG. They're dead. Everything is ruined. Your literary friend is gone, and now you're all alone.
My Literary Killer: George R. R. Martin and J.K Rowling. Notice the initials? That's how you tell a serial killer.
Can't get sleep? Well, some authors have the ability to tuck you right back into bed. As you're probably guessing, that's not a good thing. Only a boring book could bring you to sleep. Both a win and a loss.
My Sleeper: Megan Whalen Turner. Hold off the tomatoes! She's a very good writer, but I came close to sleeping more than once while reading The Thief.
Whose your feel kicker, boyfriend maker,killer and sleeper?! Let me know.