I already did the Types of Villains, and the Types of Readers. If you haven't realized by now, I like categorizing things, goddamit. But what about those majestic beings that call themselves writers? Don't they deserve to be categorized as well? No, I'm not gonna wait for you to answer that, I'm gonna start categorizing them all by myself. According to their supernatural ability.
The Feel Kicker,
Similar to an ass kicker, just way, way more cruel. If it's not obvious from the name, the Feel Kicker elicits the feels. Exactly what feels are, I'm not sure. The story doesn't have to be necessarily sad, it's just.. emotional.
Usually, I have a love-cry relationship with the Feel Kickers.
My feel kicker: Melina Merchetta.
The Boyfriend Maker,
Yes, authors make boyfriends. Literary ones, but boyfriends nonetheless!! They create the perfect guy that, once the book is closed, you try to bring him to real life. Good news is, if you succeed, wohoo! Boyfriend! Bad news is, if you succeed, you're nuts.
My Boyfriend Maker: Laini Taylor. (Akiva is sitting right next to me as I write this).
The Killer,
Some authors just want to watch the world burn. They're murderers. In my opinion, that is. COLD BLOODED MURDERERS. Oh, it's a main character that will never die, you say? WRONG. They're dead. Everything is ruined. Your literary friend is gone, and now you're all alone.
My Literary Killer: George R. R. Martin and J.K Rowling. Notice the initials? That's how you tell a serial killer.
The Sleeper,
Can't get sleep? Well, some authors have the ability to tuck you right back into bed. As you're probably guessing, that's not a good thing. Only a boring book could bring you to sleep. Both a win and a loss.
My Sleeper: Megan Whalen Turner. Hold off the tomatoes! She's a very good writer, but I came close to sleeping more than once while reading The Thief.
Whose your feel kicker, boyfriend maker,killer and sleeper?! Let me know.
Similar to an ass kicker, just way, way more cruel. If it's not obvious from the name, the Feel Kicker elicits the feels. Exactly what feels are, I'm not sure. The story doesn't have to be necessarily sad, it's just.. emotional.
Usually, I have a love-cry relationship with the Feel Kickers.
My feel kicker: Melina Merchetta.
The Boyfriend Maker,
Yes, authors make boyfriends. Literary ones, but boyfriends nonetheless!! They create the perfect guy that, once the book is closed, you try to bring him to real life. Good news is, if you succeed, wohoo! Boyfriend! Bad news is, if you succeed, you're nuts.
My Boyfriend Maker: Laini Taylor. (Akiva is sitting right next to me as I write this).
The Killer,
Some authors just want to watch the world burn. They're murderers. In my opinion, that is. COLD BLOODED MURDERERS. Oh, it's a main character that will never die, you say? WRONG. They're dead. Everything is ruined. Your literary friend is gone, and now you're all alone.
My Literary Killer: George R. R. Martin and J.K Rowling. Notice the initials? That's how you tell a serial killer.
The Sleeper,
Can't get sleep? Well, some authors have the ability to tuck you right back into bed. As you're probably guessing, that's not a good thing. Only a boring book could bring you to sleep. Both a win and a loss.
My Sleeper: Megan Whalen Turner. Hold off the tomatoes! She's a very good writer, but I came close to sleeping more than once while reading The Thief.
Whose your feel kicker, boyfriend maker,killer and sleeper?! Let me know.
You = awesome. I need to tell you that every day, right? And I need to start writing a motivational speech for you.
ReplyDeleteThe Feel Kicker: Richelle Mead. Mostly with the VA books. God, I cried during the ending of the third one and the last two books. Rose and Dimitri are perfect for each other. No exaggeration. Finally a hero who thinks his heroine is his equal *sigh*
The Boyfriend Maker: Rainbow Rowell. I adored Park in Eleanor & Park because of how honest, real and sweet he was and I'm halfway through Fangirl and Levi is awesome. Also, Stephanie Perkins. Etienne and Cricket? I wantz them.
The Killer: Uh-oh. I'm with you on this one. You just have to know that authors with names like that will kill your favorite characters. Aw man....
The Sleeper: Stephanie Meyer. I'm not a big fan of the Twilight books. I liked The Host. Her writing style is very clean and easy but the mood of her books always makes me want to sleep. Not much happens in them... Not even enough to get me angry, you know? Her books aren't bad - they're boring. That's the problem. Well, that and Edward and Bella. They're a pain in the ass. A boring one.
This list made me laugh! Love it!! I've read at least one of all of these!
ReplyDeleteNicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction
Dammit! This is another " Day Maker" post. Before I proceed, I demand that you write one "My ramblings" post everyday! I need a higher dosage. >,<
ReplyDeleteBack to topic...
Feel Kicker- Veronica Rossi. Although I didn't shed even a single tear for any of her books, I still found myself so invested. And I had a hangover for days.
Boyfriend Maker- Richelle Mead, Veronica Rossi and... JK Rowling. I love Mead's Dimitri from VA. He's dependable, logical and he's just perfect. And then, there's also Rossi's Peregrine (Perry(. His compassion, boundless loyalty and his bravery is just way too awesome. In fact, I took his name for my Shih Tzu. As for JK Rowling...need I say more? Who wouldn't want to hang out with HP's leading male characters? They're heavily flawed but their redeeming qualities are all worth it.
The Killer- JK Rowling and Pittacus Lore. >,< I am glad for not having the courage to read GOT.
The Sleeper- There's too many to write. xD
And why didn't you add the Annoyer or something like that, Reem? I swear, I'm gonna fill this comment box with my answer.
LMFAO THE SLEEPER omg that made me laugh xD That is SO FREAKIN TRUE. At first I was like "huh? The Sleeper? What is this?" and then a second later it came to me and I was like HAHAHAHAHA. For me, a sleeper would be a book that tells and tells and tells and DOES NOT SHOW. I really like it when authors kills some of her characters. I really want to read a book where the main character is killed (that sounds bad, I know).
ReplyDelete-leigh
I wanted to laugh for The Killer. Trust Reem to figure out the initials thing. Now, more reason for me to be wary and stay away from authors with initials. XD
ReplyDeleteI'm reading Days of Blood and Starlight right now, and yeah . . . I can see why you want Akiva. The hotness can not be denied.
Heh, I like categorizing things too :P.
ReplyDeleteMelina Marchetta!!! Can't wait for the Froi Read-along. I'm kind of glad we haven't done it because I'm still trying to catch up on things.... my feel kicker would be JK Rowling. Impossible not to have feels when discussing HP.
The Boyfriend Maker, Oh, hey, Akiva, what's up? Mind telling me what's going on with the 3rd Daughter cover? Where you at and what was up with that excerpt, eh? eh? Do I need to get Raffe down in here? My bf maker is Stephanie Perkins because Cricket Bell is totally my type: nerdy, smart, adorable boys FTW. (In real life, at least. I still do love some Raffe and Brigan and co. though).
The Killer - Sarah J. Maas and JKR. Haven't read enough of Martin's work :P. Though if I judge by the show.... Hey, there is an initial too. Sarah J. Hahah, maybe it's just fantasy authors, though? When else does a character get killed off?
The Sleeper, - Mine probably is Martin here. At least, that's why I'm afraid to start GoT... Or what I tell myself. Hahaha, I won't throw tomatoes for the Turner usage, but I didn't think she was that bad :P.
haha this is great! Nothing wrong with categorising things :P
ReplyDeleteFeel Kicker- I'm going to say John Green. Because even though it was just the one book which is really a feel kicker FREAKING HELL DID IT KICK HARD! (TFIOS, obviously haha)
Boyfriend Maker- Hannah Harrington. Sam from Speechless <3 And dayum I totally agree: Akiva is fiiiine!
Killer- definitely GRRM. He is freaking ruthless! Also Suzanne Collins (interestingly no initials!)
Sleeper- (don't kill me) JRR Tolkien. I just could not take The Fellowship. FREAKING NOTHING HAPPENED!
Obviously TFioS is a huge feel kicker. Haven't read it, but I pretty much know the ending, so..
ReplyDeleteSam! he was so cute and as close to a gentleman as one could get.
Hmm, that's interesting. Betcha Suzanne Collins is not her real name. No honest to god killer uses their real name. That's like SerialKiller101
I haven't read the books, but I do know they're a snooze fest. I haven't even watched the movies (l know!), so I'm agreeing with you blindly ;)
Me too! Plus I'm reeling from the book thief. There's only so many feels one can handle. J,K Rowling is a major feel kicker as well. She's brutal!
ReplyDeleteOoooh, if Akiva isn't in like 40% of the novel with his gorgeousness alongside, I will be pissed! I don't know Cricket Ball, but yeah I do like the nerdy/cute boys sometimes.
I knooooow!! Fantasy authors are mean and cruel and they are total murderers. Don't know what that says about me since my favourtie genre is fantasy. I haven't read GoT, so I'm judging by the show too ;)
Martin would probably be The Sleeper too. I heard he spends pages describing food. Turner's novel was short, so there's that, but she spends too much time describing scenery, and I zone out.
Bam! Now we know which authors have murderous intentions. and yaay for DoBaS!! Akiva is what I like to call.. ajjsdkwakhag
ReplyDeleteHa!! I was too close to making one innuendo or another there, but decided other wise. And yes, they do exist don't they?! It's like the basic rule of writing! Show don't freaking tell :P
ReplyDeleteI don't mind a main character getting killed either!
Yaaay!! Haha, I totally have fun writing these, so I wouldn't mind. There's a whole series of ramblings coming soon :P
ReplyDeleteYeah, i don't think feels mean necessarily crying. People love Veronica Rossi's writing too.
I haven't read books by the first two (I know right?), but I totally agree with JK Rowling. If I had to pick, I would choose Draco Malfoy. Now, I know that's a weird choice, but I'm sorted in Slytherin anyway.
I haven't read GoT, only the show, and I know that man's nuts :P
Who's your Annoyer, btw?! :P
Glad you liked it, Nicole :)
ReplyDeleteYes, yes you do!! It is like the reason for my existence!! :P
ReplyDeleteYou love the VA books, don't you?! I mean, everyone raves about them, but I can't get around to reading them. I just can't. Damn my prejudice against vampires :/
Also haven't read any book by Rainbow Rowell. People adore Fangirl and Eleanor & Park. I'd probably pick them up when I need a cutesy read. Christina did mention the Cricket person above :P Sounds like a charmer.
I know, right? You see initials, and you walk the other way.
HAHAHAHA!! A boring pain in the ass!! I is dead, and you is hilarious :P Haven't read the book, but I would totally fall flat and sleep if I did. I would probably have suicidal tendencies as well.
Hahaha, another awesome post, Reem! I love this.
ReplyDeleteMy Feel Kicker is probably ... er, I dunno if I have one. I'M SO STOIC!
My Boyfriend Maker? Hrm... not sure I have one of those either. Probably goes back to the whole not-feeling-things thing. Now I'm just starting to sound creepy...
My Killer is definitely Cassandra Clare... she may not kill off that many characters, but she sure loves to TORTURE them, which is kind of the same thing.
My Sleeper? Melina Marchetta. Sooorrryyyyyyyy. :P
Haha, this great! I 3 your lists, Reem! Keep on making them!!
ReplyDeleteGeorge R. R. Martin and JK are KILLLERS.
Feel Kickers: Katja Millay and Colleen Hoover. I don't cry much over books, but they can make me cry buckets. I LOVE them.
Boyfriend Maker: hmmm, I don't really have book boyfriends, but I do <3 Raffe (and am particularly itching to read World After RIGHT NOW), so Susan Ee
Sleeper:Tamara Ireland Stone. I thought Time Between Us is going to be my next favorite book and zzzz~
Hmm, Cassandra Clare for a killer? Wouldn't have guessed it. But yeah, I agree about the torture thing.
ReplyDeleteHa, and I did know you had troubles with Melina Merchetta, so no worries :P
HAHAHA noice XD I think I love the feel kickers and boyfriend makers the best :> I like getting emotional sometimes, and I would not pass up reading about the perfect guys, either! I just dunno about liking killers... I mean JK is the bomb diggity, but GRR Martin... he just depresses me :( And I don't think I like books that make me fall asleep :))
ReplyDeleteHa! Glad we agree on that. They are, aren't they? ;)
ReplyDeletePeople love Colleen Hoover's books, so I can't argue.
Oh, Raffe! He's what I like to call a stud muffin (err.. not that I call anyone that. Ever). Some people got their World After ARCs and I can't wait until it's out.
I don't know who she is, but her name is pretty cool :P I want my middle name to be Ireland :/